Happy Monday!
I know. Two words that rarely go together. I think we can all agree on happy Saturday and certainly happy Friday. But Monday? Okay, maybe it’s happy because YOU are here.
Down to business and my personal opinions.
Are you worth the effort? Do you shower, shave and spit shine every day, or do you even bother? Every time I go to the grocery store or a big box store, I see them. Women and some men who are overweight and who have given up on themselves. For the gals, their hair has grown out to where a couple of inches of gray show, there’s not a speck of makeup, and those yoga pants were so last decade. In my case, some pants are last century. For the guys, their tshirts have food stains, those knee holes in the jeans aren’t intentional, and their fingernail dirt could grow fishing worms.
These are people who have given up on presenting their best face forward, and let’s be honest, everyone has been there at one time or another in their life. I’d let myself go when becoming an authorpreneur. Being at home all day, chained to a keyboard meant no one saw me shoveling handfuls of gummi bears into my mouth, OD’ing on diet soda, and skipping this year’s workouts.
What was my personal epiphany? Photographs, high blood pressure, and getting my nails done professionally by Glitter KC’s CEO, Kim Trentham. Photos told me my clothes weren’t shrinking as much as I was expanding. The high blood pressure after a lifetime of “Are you even alive??” low said the lifestyle needed a change. And finally? Getting my nails done reminded me of how good I’d felt with a fresh coat of polish applied by a professional. Like I was worth the time and cost it took.
Do you know what? Everyone is. Everyone is worth the time and cost to make themselves feel and look good. My grandma had a saying, if you look good, you feel good, and if you feel good, you do good. A lot of word echoes in this paragraph, but it’s true. Your thoughts affect your feelings, and both affect your actions.
Bottom line? Do something nice for yourself today. It doesn’t have to be a marathon in the time it takes or a fortune in expense. Something simple and self-improving just for you. And then? Do something nice for someone else. Anyone and anything as long as it’s helpful.
Tell me what you love improving your appearance, and how you give back to others and the world. I walk several miles a week, paint my nails, and skip dessert. I also give to various charities and volunteer at my American Legion unit. Comment below on what you did in the nice area today, or if you’ve already given back before hanging out with me here.
Laura Stapleton, Author 
I can agree with you on almost all of it and have known both the feeling of giving up on myself because I didn’t feel I was worth it as well as crawling out of the hole and knowing just how reinvigorating a shower can feel. Sometimes it just makes me feel human again. Although, I must admit that I probably now take excessively long showers sometimes. LOL I had to crawl out of the hole of depression and hopelessness and now I try to cherish every moment of life because I know just how short it can be and that it’s not guaranteed. However, with all that being said you might see me in the stores and think that I’m one of those that have given up based on appearance. I very rarely wear makeup because it is just not something that I feel the need to. I do at times when I just want to give myself a little pick-me-up or boost or just feel a little special going out. But most of the time I won’t wear it. I think that one is a personal choice for everyone. I probably won’t dye my hair but I’m not sure yet because I get excited when I find a grey hair. It’s my bling-bling. lol Two of the things that I personally get judged on are my pants and shoes though. Those are two things I do not have much choice about though because of health reasons. They are clean and well-kept even if not fashionable. Oh how I have shoe envy though!!!! What I wouldn’t give to be able to wear clothes that fit correctly as well as comfortable shoes that are cute!!! Maybe one day someone with Lymphedema will become a designer and make clothes that fit us. I can always dream!!! So even though it is not my personal choice in those two matters I still get judged and stared at. Of course not as much as when I wear shorts and my legs can actually be seen. But I digress. I DO think that I am one of the exceptions to the rule compared to what you are referring to. The only thing is that appearances can be deceiving and judgments are difficult. I’m learning to have a thicker skin and just know they don’t know the situation and I don’t have a neon flashing sign saying I have Lipoedema, Lymphedema, and many other health problems. So I let it go.
The rest of it I totally agree with you on. It does make you feel better and worth it when you pamper yourself a little bit and take care of yourself. I feel that when you feel good about yourself then you radiate happiness and that in turn causes other people around you to be happier as well because of the ripple effect. I don’t make myself feel better by looking good though. I DO value personal hygiene and clean clothes, etc for both my son and I. However, I make the CHOICE to feel good and to try to be optimistic and have a positive attitude. I am in a Dialectic Behavioral Therapy group to learn new skills on positive self-talk, mindfulness, and much more. Those skills are things that make me feel good about myself. Spending time with my son and doing little things together makes me feel good and all those things radiate outwards into the world. At least I hope so. That is also our way of giving back to the world. We try to be especially friendly and cheerful and nice so that other people will feel that and try to be as well. We smile and laugh a lot and live our life the best we can. That is how we are trying to make the world a better place, just by hopefully helping other people smile and feel good too. Like the old Michael Jackson song we need to start with the man in the mirror and that is what I’m trying to do. Even if I’m not fashionable and have to wear slippers when my feet are swollen we haven’t given up on the world or ourselves. I totally believe that if everyone just tried to be a bit kinder to each other this world would be a much better place. ❤
Oh Nancy! No judgment here, I promise! You know there’s a difference between, “I’m not wearing makeup because it’s too much,” versus, “I’m not wearing makeup because why bother?” What’s funny is I wrote the blog post yesterday, yet today I’m out in public with ratty yoga pants, no makeup, and a 5k race tshirt. It’s just one of those things where a walk in the park meant no fuss. I think it’s more something I see in women’s eyes where they’ve given up on a full time basis.
I wonder what it would take to be a clothing designer? Classes? If anyone could be a great clothing advocate for Lymphedema, it’d be you. ❤
I know you wouldn’t judge and are so amazing that you’d understand. (hug) I can’t even sew so being a clothes designer might be an interesting endeavor. lol But thank you, you are a sweetheart! ❤