One of those days.

Maybe it’s really one of THOSE days.  The one where you keep holding out hope that things will be ok.  That after every downturn, you’ll ratchet up the ‘it’ll be ok’ in your heart and believe it.  Until the next downturn.  Still, you try again, thinking maybe this new solution will do the trick.

We lost a pet today.  Not the worst thing to ever happen to someone, no.  I’ve endured worse.  And yet, this one was tough.  The little guy had a good ten years left in him.  The one time he isn’t keen on his food, the boy loved his dinner, and I knew something was very wrong with him.  I didn’t sleep well last night.

At the vet’s first thing in the morning, not so bad, let’s see.  Back at the vet, it’s not good, maybe surgery.  During surgery, we could either try to fix him or let him go.  The fix wasn’t recommended.  So, we three said goodbye to a cat that was a friend during a scary and sad time for me.  Unconditional love from a cat?  He gave it and got it, too.

I have others I should have told before any blog readers.  It’d be the right thing to do, I suppose.  My ache is still too fresh in the heart to give the news and hear “Why didn’t you…?”, “You should of…,” and other sentences that tell me I didn’t do enough for the animal to save his life.  I’m not in the mood for it now, and don’t know if I ever will be.

I had serious plans for today of serious work on Undesirable.  I wanted to write glorious scenes set in the vast, dry plains of Wyoming along the Sweetwater river.  Instead, I’ll wait until tomorrow to zone out and give way to the movies/stories in my head.


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